The past two posts that I’ve written were about the advice my dad had for parents.  He said to communicate with your kids;  to make sure they hear what you are saying and to listen to what they have to say.

I told my sister what dad said and she added ” Ask you children why they are behaving a certain way before you rush to judgement.

She said that one day she trying to get out of the house to take my nephew to school and told him to go upstairs, get his coat and put it on.   She was busy doing last minute things and Matt had not put his coat on, so she told him again with a more forceful tone.  When she was ready to walk out the door,  Matt still did not have on his coat.  At that point she was really exasperated and she asked him why he had not put his coat on  when she had asked him to do so two times.  And he said, “Because my coat is in my room and  I’m scared there’s a monster upstairs.”  Matt was at the age when monsters are a big thing.   Kay gave him a hug, went upstairs with him, helped him put on his coat,  and they made it to school on time.

She stopped, took a deep breath, and remembered to ask him why.  She avoided an unnecessary argument and managed to keep peace.

How many times do we caused an unnecessary  argument simply because we don’t take the time to ask why?

Today’s parenting nugget is “Ask why before you jump to conclusions!”

The next time your children don’t do what you tell them, ask why.  They may have a good reason!

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